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Instagram Is Removing Its “Following” Tab (feat. Chris Jericho) – Lights Out with David Spade


I almost gave you
the pile driver. -I came behind you.
-Right behind me, yeah. Right behind you.
You never see it coming. Can I just say,
Megan didn’t get the message that guests are supposed
to wear black leather jackets? -Yeah.
-I know. I’m so honored to be here
with the T-Birds tonight. ♪ There’s gonna be
a rumble tonight. ♪ SPADE:
I love it. (humming ’60s tune) SPADE:
She was just… She almost didn’t get out
of her time machine from the ’70s tonight, though. Look at these pants. -Look at them.
-I love when, uh, women were -respected the most,
you know, so… -Yeah. Oh. -Is that the ’70s? -That’s…
You know what? When I’m gonna be with you, I’m like,
“Someone’s gonna be handsy. I’ll dress for the time
that you love.” -Hey!
-(laughter) -(applause) -Oh, wait.
That’s a joke about me. Forget it.
I take it back. -Uh, let’s get right to it.
-GELMAN: Do I look more or less Jewish
in a leather jacket? -(laughter)
-Wow. -I think it’s the comb-over
that really… -SPADE: Yeah. -Is it a comb-over?
-Is it just stylish? It’s stylish,
it’s distinguished. It’s-it’s ’70s day here
in Lights Out. It is not a…
it’s not a comb-over. -I’m not hiding my baldness,
Chris. -SPADE: Oh, yes. You’ve never thought
about taking the beard and going this way? (laughter) -Just the whole face? -I…
I’m just brainstorming. Yeah. -Just hair and a… a nose.
-Yeah. And then you go like this.
(quiet squeak) -In technology news, um…
-(laughter) Instagram has removed
its “following” tab so we can no longer see who our friends and
significant others are liking. The change comes
after ten million guys cheating on their girlfriend
signed a petition. -(laughter)
-Um… Megan, you’re engaged. Is this going to affect
your relationship? I’m the…
I’m the hottest he could get, so he doesn’t dream bigger
than me. You know? Like… SPADE:
That’s a smart way to go if… -It’s incredible.
-That’s right. -(applause)
-I know, ’cause that thing, if no one can see, guys
are gonna be in the bathroom an extra ten minutes. (imitates rapid typing) Just liking the shit
out of, uh… -You know what Instagram is,
right? -Yeah. No, I do. -I’m-I’m single now, so…
-Oh, nice! nobody’s checking up on me. -(laughter)
-Oh. -But… -I know, it’s nice
to be single and on Fleabag. -Yeah. Right?
-Yeah. You hear that, gals? (cheering, applause) -And five other shows.
-Hey. -Yeah. -Do you like, uh…
Yeah, I know. Do you like
alcoholic misogynists? (laughter) I play one on nine shows. Uh, Chris, we haven’t heard
a lot from you. Yeah, I was kind of,
uh, happy to hear about this development
on Instagram technology, because I was getting trolled from, uh, sending
all the dick pics to your DM. -Uh-huh.
-So now people won’t know that, and hopefully, you’ll answer. -Now that we actually…
-Is that you? Because sometimes they don’t
attach the rest of the body, so I just see the wieners,
and then I sort of… I’m the guy whose wiener
got stolen from your monologue. (laughter) Callback. -Good callback.
-Chris… -Yeah? -Chris, I have a hunch
just from looking at you that you have a very thick dick. -Geez.
-(laughter) Um, sh… short and thick. -Short and thick?
-Good-sized balls, though. No, but short and…
short and thick really gets in there
in a way that… It does, but only in certain…
certain far… it only goes so far. So you’re allowed
to say something like that, -SPADE: Yeah.
-and I’m not allowed… -Wow! -I got something here
on camera. (whooping, applause) I think guys
just go with it, right? -Yeah.
-Chris, look at you. I feel like your pubes
are in a ponytail.

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